Anal. The holy grail. Desired by so many but achieved by so few. So how can you make your buttfucking dreams into ass-stuffing reality? For you gay guys out there, achieving anal isn’t quite so complicated. Find a willing fella and go to town.
If that’s what you’re in the market for, you’re in the wrong place, by the way. You’re not far, though—just click through, take a quick peek next to the search bar at the top of the page, and make those gender symbols both a matching shade of blue. You’ll be surrounded by asses that are more to your liking in no time.
For those like me who dream of a softer, more hairless ass, there are a few other ways to find one.
Your best bet to be the type of attractive, in shape, and rich alpha-male that hot slutty women love to throw their holes at. Since you’re here, we’ll assume that you’re far from that and move right along.
Another option is to get a girl drunk enough that she’s willing to let you stick it in her ass, or, if she still says no, getting her even drunker so that she doesn’t notice when you do it anyways. But in this day and age, guys like us need to be careful of using social lubricants in the place of actual lubricants. So for those days that you aren’t having the best of luck and you inevitably strike out, you’re going to be stuck with porn.
It’s 2019 and anal sex is mainstream now, which means everybody is having it except for you. This is good news for fans of anal who aren’t cool enough to regularly find an ass to fuck: many generous women and their big-dicked fuckbuddies have, for whatever reason, decided to share footage of their adventures online. When they’re overcome by this urge, one of their top destinations for uploading is xHamster’s anal section.
xHamster’s History Of Anal
xHamster has been around for twelve years, which in internet terms is practically an eternity. As one of the forerunners of somehow convincing people to upload their homemade porn without compensation or reward, they’ve been able to build up possibly the internet’s biggest collection of girls getting fucked. And, thankfully for guys like us, that includes girls getting fucked in the ass.
And what an anal section it is! Despite the incredibly clinical headline that xHamster has inexplicably chosen to feature (“a man inserting his cock into the asshole of a woman and fucking her rectum in pursuit of his orgasm”) at the top of the page, there is a lot to choose from here.
Finding the Right Asshole
Getting to what you’re looking for isn’t a problem. The site isn’t fancy, and its design philosophy could be charitably described as “classic.” But when you’re looking for tits and ass, do things need to be complicated? Hell no! Open up the site and you’re faced with a bunch of thumbnails. Mouse over them for a preview, find something you like, open it up, and blow your load. It’s not rocket science.
When what you’re offered up front isn’t meeting your needs, xHamster does let you change things up a bit. By default, they’ll show you their featured videos, which is what some guy in a suit decided you’d want to beat your meat too. Kind of creepy when you think about it, but hey, he’s got some alright tastes.
If you trust the unwashed masses more than your corporate overlords, switch things up and click through to get a selection of the best videos they have to offer—here you can sort by the public’s best rated, most viewed, and most commented videos, giving you the opportunity to jerk it to the same stuff that as many other people as possible are masturbating to at the same time. Hey, whatever floats your boat.
If you’re incredibly brave, you can also sort the videos so that you see only the most recently uploaded. xHamster’s popularity is a double-edged sword here—new videos pop up nearly every minute, and they’re not subject to any quality control. You might come across the perfect video that you’ll bookmark and keep coming back to for years, or you might accidentally find your grandparents getting down on top of the family dinner table. Proceed with caution.
If plain old anal isn’t hitting the spot, xHamster lets you narrow things down a bit. If you’re looking for a fresh piece of ass, they’ve got a subsection for teen anal. If the mom next door is more of your type, check out the mature anal section. If you’re a fan of bigger girls, you could always sneak over to the BBW anal section (I won’t tell, everyone has their secrets). And hey, if real women are too intimidating, they’ve got a hentai anal section too. No matter how fucked up of a degenerate you are, xHamster will have some type of buttfucking that meets your own strange needs.
And if none of that works for you, and you need a more personal, interactive experience? xHamster’s anal section offers a direct link to hundreds of live camgirls willing to shove things up their ass for your own personal pleasure (for the right price).
If you’re a masturbator of discriminating tastes (or if you’ve beat your meat to xHamster’s selections so many times that you’re out of anything to watch), there is also a selection of longer, higher-quality anal videos reserved for users of xHamster Premium. For a mere ten dollars a month you can partake in ad-free, 4K HD, full-length ass-fucking porn from almost three hundred premium content producers like Private Society, Team Skeet, and Exxxtra Small until your heart’s content. Watch out, Netflix—you’ve got some competition.
Last but not least, if you’re so dedicated to beating your meat that you’ve got a VR headset, xHamster has a special category just for you. With VR anal videos, everything will seem true to real life right up until you cum, until you take off your goggles and have to face the sad reality of your lonely, depressing life once again.
No-Frills Access To One Of The Internet’s Biggest Bonanzas of Buttfucking
But now that you know what’s out there, let’s get to the important stuff: the content. All the variety and choice in the world doesn’t matter if everything you have to choose from is just one thousand and one variations of some ugly whore touching her disease-ridden asshole and filming it with a potato manufactured in East Germany in 1982.
Thankfully, most of the videos here are of the high standard that you’ve come to expect as one of my fans. Especially if you stick to the “Featured” and “Best” sections, pretty much everything you come across will be worthy of shooting a load to. You’ll find professional stuff, regular guys filming their girlfriends take it in the ass and everything in between. There are some ads and a small watermark on each video, but they don’t distract from the experience—just keep your eyes on the prize and you’ll hardly notice them.
The site runs perfectly on desktop and on your Android or iPhone. Each version offers all of the same features, so you can check out video previous and narrow down your choices to find the perfect video whether you’re sitting comfortably at home or hiding in an airplane bathroom after ogling a particularly attractive stewardess.
xHamster’s anal section is a classic. It might not be new and exciting, and it may be missing some of those fancy features that the new kids on the block are bragging about. But is all of that fluff really necessary? If you’re looking for what porn sites do best—a huge selection of high-quality videos of hot girls getting fucked in the ass—xHamster’s anal section can’t be beaten.
If you’re looking for an old favorite that you assumed was lost to time, you’ve got better chances of finding it here than anywhere else. And if you’re looking to waste an evening flipping through videos and jacking off, xHamster has the volume and variety to satisfy you like no other site.
My Favorite Feature—And Its Biggest Drawback
My favorite feature that sets xHamster apart from the competition is its active community. It’s easy to get distracted by the videos of girls taking it up the ass, but each video page also has a comment section. Sure, 99% of the users are lonely loser’s like you, but there’s also that rare 1%: girls that like dicks in their asses. When you spot a unicorn like this, shoot your shot—if your message stands out from what the other thousand desperate virgins say to her, maybe you’ll get a chance to blow your next load in her instead of all over your keyboard.
ThePornDude likes xHamster Anal's
- More anal porn than you’ll ever know what to do with
- Loads of amateur and professional videos, plus camgirls
- Plenty of search tools and filters to help you find the perfect video
- An active community of girls looking for sex
ThePornDude hates xHamster Anal's
- Overwhelming amount of content makes it hard to find a good video if you don’t know what you’re looking for
- Ads and watermarks, even if they don’t really get in the way
- A hundred willing men for every interested woman