The Kristen Archives
While fap footage presented in the traditional, multimedia form is most excellent, there are some ways in which written smut is even better.
After all, with erotic literature, you can insert little details and nuances into the story with your own imagination. Or at least you can with well-written literotica. Good erotic literature has enough detail to hold your interest yet leaves a few aspects of the story open to the machinations of your own creativity to fill in certain holes, so to speak.
Sadly, every fucker with a keyboard and an internet connection can put out some painfully, badly written smut stories – just like tube sites. And just like vetting tube sites, I’ve made it my mission to help you guys find the best literotica producers and alert you to the ones you should avoid.
While doing research to fulfill this mission, I came across (figuratively speaking) an amazing literotica writer who goes by the pen name Kristen.
So, interested in learning more about one of the best literotica writer’s on the net?
Then keep on reading…
“Who Is Kirsten?”
Well, for one she’s been writing, publishing, and collecting erotic literature since 1997. These smut stories range from standard fantasy porn to every fetish you can imagine, plus a few you probably couldn’t.
So far, Kristen has eighty-six sections, called directories, of literotica which contain links to dozens of stories. New stories are added all of the time so check out each repository is its own reward. And as a fun bonus, at the bottom of each repository there is a pretty comedic and pornographic cartoon.
It’s no wonder that Alt Story Sex Repository prominently features Kristen on their site.
(And if you’re curious about that larger site, check out my review of ASSTR here. [link])
Anyway, that’s all that I can say that I know about Kristen’s story for sure. However, I should add that if she wants to reach out to me and tell me more, I’ll be sure to make an addition to this article. On top of that, if she’s as pretty in person as she looks on her site, then I’ll add: Kristen, you should definitely contact me so we can get to know each other even more intimately. 😉
“What’s In Kristen’s Collection?”
As I said, the Collection truly is all over the place when it comes to content. Based on her own stuff and her favorites, her tastes are quite diverse. For instance, on her Favorites page, there are stories about first-time lesbian experiences, a character being “raped” by an ape, sex with demons, run-of-the-mill femdom scenarios, necrophilia fantasies, and erotic historical fiction.
There are even stories combining white slavery, involve drugs, and dwarfs.
I told you there were more types of stories than you could (probably) imagine.
And keep in mind, tons of the content in the Archive has been made by other fans of Kristen, so be careful of which author you read. Some are well put together and thoroughly edited, and others are subpar.
Further, many of these stories date back from the days of Usenet. So, get ready to endure some really old formatting and text font.
“Wait! What Is This Websites Philosophy?”
Yes, this site is that deep.
I should first say again that Kristen’s archive is really sub-site of ASSTR. But her content adheres to ASSTR’s webmaster’s, Andrew Webber, mission statement.
The Archive, like ASSTR, exists to give people a platform to talk about sex through the art of fiction. And since everyone has a different view on fucking and their fantasies range from humdrum to hot damn (!) the Archive is a welcoming and accepting place for all kinds of stories about sexuality.
Since it is so open, there exists a lot of “offensive” content. Of course, every goddamn thing offends people nowadays, but there is, for sure, some freakier smut stories on here. Hell, even by my standards there are some raunchy romances which made be debate whether or not I should wank to it or get a psychologist to analyze it.
But, just like I have said before, if it ain’t hurting anybody, there’s nothing inherently wrong with it. Along with that, Webber does say that the Archive isn’t for children even though a good deal of teenagers seem to read it anyway.
Officially, I have the same stance on that, too. I hair hasn’t been on your junk for at least seven years, then this site isn’t for you.
“What Are These Weird Abbreviations?”
As I said, there is some pretty racy smut on this site which covers a variety of literotica genres. For this reason, there are a number of abbreviations which appear next to each title, so you get a clear idea of what you are going to read. To give you a few “translations” and even more of a hint of what you’ll find, I’ll go over a few…
sm – sadomasochism in which there is pain (and pleasure) given to both people involved. viol – short for violence, the site clarifies that not all stories with this material are “sad.” mc – mind control of a man, women, or whatever have you. best – short for bestiality, yep this is exactly what it sounds like.
These are just a few and there is stuff, even more, let’s say, “exotic” abbreviations which I encourage you to check out for yourself.
“What Else Does Kristen Like?”
Writer’s never produce their content in a vacuum. Or good ones don’t at the very least.
To see what Kristen and her fellow writers draw inspiration from, check out the “Our Favorite Sex Sites” area of her website.
Perhaps I’ll do full reviews of these sites at a later date, but just so you know, here’s a rundown on some of Kristen’s favorite literotica and pornographic websites…
Eros Blog – Combining humor, literotica, and original art, this fun blog has smut stories dating back from 2002, and new stuff uploaded all of the time.
Unscathed Corpse – Weird title I know, but this site has a surprising amount of picture porn which combines BDSM, artistry, and humor.
xHamster Porn – Curiously, the link listed on the Archive takes you to the gay section of a famous tube. I’ve already written about it on my other site, My Gay Sites [link], so if you want a full review go there. I’m not entirely sure why it’s there other than it seems pretty clear that Kristen likes fag fap material.
Sex Happy – Apparently one of the few Tumblr pages which still has porn, if you want to switch over to visual erotic entertainment check this page out.
Linda Sue’s Diary – Interested in reading – and seeing pics to prove – the real confessions of adult’s sordid sex lives? Then this is the blog for you.
Just so you know, Sexoteric Blog, Adult Fan Fiction, Dick-N-Jane, and Having My Cake… are down, so don’t bother with them.
“There Is A Forum, Too?!”
Yep, called Kristen’s Board, there is even a formal forum for you to connect and bounce all ideas off of, too. In addition to talking to people, you can even message Andrew Webber directly and publically.
Besides all of that, there are general discussion threads where you can discuss music, movies, books, and other writers like you would on any other forum. There is even a massive political section which is intended to allow you and others to have “a good rant at those slugs.”
“Why Do You Like Kristen’s Archive?”
Because she and Webber are just like me – they love smut, are open-minded, and have a give no fucks attitude. But moving on, let’s get on to the big issue, should I check this sub-site out?”
Well, the variety of literotica is great, and the sheer number of stories is enormous. The level of quality can be hit or miss, and you’ll have to adjust to the old style formatting. But if you’re super into the whole literotica thing, this site is a must to check out.
All things considered, I award Kristen’s Archive four out of five hands.
Lastly, I further award Kristen personally five out of five hands and a firm eggplant.
ThePornDude likes The Kristen Archives's
- Hosting literally thousands of stories you will never, ever be bored
- The forum is bursting with activity – among other things – and is well-designed
- Besides the forum, there are tons of extra links and features to check out
- The search engine is surprisingly good
ThePornDude hates The Kristen Archives's
- The archaic formatting is straight out of 1994 might making reading stories difficult for some
- Some people may toss their cookies after reading some stories
- There are a lot of broken links as well as needed updates